As you go deeper and deeper into your 20s, and/or post-graduate life, you may find that your circle of friends is getting smaller and smaller.
The truth of the matter is that people come into your life for reasons and seasons, and as you grow older, some people’s “season” have run its course. It’s perfectly normal to outgrow your friends. The partners in crime you had during your teenage and college years, have grown up and outgrown the activities you did during your adolescent years.
Below are 7 main reasons that you have outgrown your friends.
1. You’re Maturing While They’re NOT
One main reason people tend to outgrow their friends is the simple fact that one of you is way more mature than the other. It’s extremely difficult to carry on any type of relationship with someone you think does the most childish things. On the contrary, someone who feels you’re too “judgemental” on their life will begin to distance themselves from you for the simple fact that they’re tired of feeling “lectured”. If you want your friendship to last, try easing up on the advice sessions, and just let them grow at their own pace and time.
2. Different Strokes For Different Folks
You like red, she likes blue. You date guys, but she dates girls. Opposites attract, but sometimes when it comes to friendships, if you begin to have close to nothing in common with your “bestie” the universe will do its job at pulling you two away from each other. It’s not easy to hang out with someone who you hardly have anything in common with.
3. Lifestyle Changes
As we get older we are faced with some serious decisions that can cause major lifestyle changes in our lives. Sometimes these lifestyle changes can really have an impact on some of our closest relationships. Have you decided to give up partying,drinking, and smoking all together? Have you got involved in a relationship that occupies most of your free time? Well guess what….your friends still want to party and they’ll do it without you. Eventually someone will fill that void that you left open due to you being too wrapped up in your boyfriend to want to hang out anymore…..#IJS
4. Drugs & Alcohol
Somewhere after high school, during college, and right after college graduation, your close friend got caught up in their “experimenting” with drugs. With the plethora of addicting drugs easily available to today’s youth, many people are making are becoming immune to popping pill for a good time. If you’re someone who can enjoy life without taking a pill, or getting completely wasted, that could cause a major strain between you and a friend who rather pop a pill of happiness to enjoy life even more. If you have a friend with a drug or alcohol problem the last thing you want to do is stop being their friend. Continue to be there for them and show support in getting them the help they need.
5. Someone Hasn’t Found Themselves
It’s the most annoying part of your 20s. Finding yourself , knowing yourself, and loving exactly who you are is no easy task. For those who are having issues with finding themselves, it puts them in an extremely insecure state of mind where they’re caught up comparing themselves to others, reminiscing on the past, or hiding away in their homes and sulking in their depressed thoughts. We are always finding ourselves, no matter how old we get. But there are many of us who embrace who we are on a daily basis, with a confidence that shines through. However, for those who don’t have the privilege of having that self-confidence, it can lead them to pushing people away as they work on “finding themselves”. Give your friends the patient, time, and space they need while they begin their journey of self-love.
6. Jealousy & Insecurity
Jealousy and insecurity have been the root cause of broken friendships for as long as humans have walked the Earth. One main reason you and your friend could be drifting apart is because he/she is jealous of your life, your success, your relationship with your boyfriend, your job, your degree, and the list goes on. Again, in a situation like this you want to give your friend some space while they work to find themselves. In finding themselves they’ll learn to appreciate the things in life they cannot control or change.
7. Long Distance Relationship
Did you best friend move to an entirely new city or state? The way you two use to party together, shop together, and go to the movies together has now been replaced with quarterly Facetime sesssions and sporadic text conversations. Long distance relationships aren’t easy, but real friendships can stand the test of time and distance. If you have a long distance friendship with a person you never want to lose, fight for that friendship. Go book a ticket for the next flight out-of-town and go visit your bestie. They should also be willing to do the same.